English – Down Under and Up Over

English – Down Under and Up Over is a humorous look at the English language from the point of view of a foreigner studying, learning, and communicating in English. It is not a textbook, but laugh-out-loud stories peppered with idioms, oxymora, and correlated jokes. It is wittily written to illustrate the importance of knowing the multiple meanings of words, the variety of spellings, and the culture, making a difference between understanding or being lost in translation.

This book is dedicated to New Zealand and her people. As a result of the unfortunate earthquake disaster in Christchurch, the author and the publisher have donated 100 copies to those affected by this tragedy, in hopes of easing their pain and providing them with a little humor during this hard time.

English – Down Under and Up Over, ISBN 978-0-473-17323-4 can be purchased from book stores or direct from the publisher: The Copy Press. Phone: 643-547-2972. Fax: 643-547-2973. www.copypress.co.nz. E-mail: infor@copypress.co.nz. Price $25

INTRODUCTION:

This book is to illustrate in a humorous way how difficult learning English is as a second language. Reading this book will create hours of laughter along with many awareness about the complexity of the English language for both a native speaker and for one who is learning it.

English is the most popular language in the world, because of the number of persons who use it, the geographical spread of its use, and the variety of purposes for which it is used. The more widely a language is used, the more potential it has for variation. And the paradox of diversity in unity is more apparent in English than any other language spoken upon, in the entire world. I learned this the hard way in getting my graduate degrees in America, and traveling to Great Britain, Canada, Australia and living in New Zealand.

According to Webster’s New World Dictionary, English is one of the hardest languages to learn as a second language. It is the most commonly spoken language in the world, because In every international gathering, English is the official language whether or not there is a representative from an English speaking country participating at the meeting.

The language known as “English” and spoken by Brits, Scots, Irish, Americans, Canadians, Kiwis, Aussies, etc. is by no means standardized or homogeneous. In some cases, their differences are so significant that one would think that it is a completely different language! Depending on the circumstances, this can be quite comical or stressful for both the “native” speaker” and a “foreigner.” The pronunciation, the use of words, the many different meanings of a word, spelling, sentence structure, along with colloquial expressions create enormous difficulties that are quite challenging, funny, and most of all confusing.

A simple example is, “The wheel of a car.” It is spelled tire in the United States, but spelled tyre in the UK and other commonwealth countries. However, the confusion comes, at some point in the evening you may tire and decide to go to bed. English most definitely with its many colorful variations is a most intriguing language to study!”

I love to travel, especially to countries I haven’t been before. I consider traveling like a great book, and if you haven’t traveled you haven’t read a page. Being an invited guest lecturer for cruise lines since 2001 has provided me with the unique privilege to travel around the globe that I am very grateful about.

Stories, jokes, and slang from New Zealand, Australia, America, and the United Kingdom give good examples illustrating the differences in English depending upon where it is spoken!

When I moved to New Zealand, I had to learn Kiwi English which was a different language from the one it took me 35 years in America to reach my comfort zone. I had to start all over again, and I’m learning more everyday. However, it’s not happening fast enough at my age.

Pronunciations, slang, and spellings in Kiwi and Aussie English are quite different than American English. What is known as a napkin in the US is called a serviette in Down Under. If you asked for a napkin in a restaurant, you would get a funny look from the waitress. In Kiwi English, a napkin is actually a diaper, or nappy as they call it. And when the waitress comes back and says, “Is that the lot there?” don’t be baffled, she just wants to know if you have everything. Breakfast is brekkie, lunch is dinner, and dinner is tea, so be careful to use the right word when you invite your friends over! If someone tells you that my husband is crook, it is not for being a thief; this word is used for sick!

Remembering all the crazy situations I have been in, along with the many times of simply being frustrated and lost in translation, now makes me laugh. This is my reason for sharing the language stories with others hoping to help new learners to better cope with some of their own embarrassing moments. And for “the experts” to try “putting the shoe on the other foot.”

Considering the topic of this book, sit back, and start reading to entertain yourself. And if you see some mistakes in my book, please relax and forgive me. Remembering that, “I no good speak English,” just have fun with it.

The Journey – An Immigrant’s Story

The Journey – An Immigrant’s Story is a personal and intimate description of life in the Middle East, the culture, religion, corruption and problems juxtaposed with a memorable and insightful study of the often frustrating and sometimes humorous process of an immigrant blending the cultures of East and West, past and present. Timely, informative, inspiring, and thought-provoking. A definite must read for those interested in the world of the Middle East, and for young adults, as it is a story of perseverance, determination, never giving up on dreams, and striving for “excellence!”

This is a true story that one cannot help but care about as it is written from the heart and from the poverty and desperation of the Middle East. The immigrant’s strength of character and optimism shines throughout the book. This is not only a page-turner, but it is also a mind-opener.

The Journey – An Immigrant’s Story, ISBN 0-9674480-2-6 can be purchased from book stores or direct from the publisher: The Copy Press. Phone: 643-547-2972. Fax: 643-547-2973. www.copypress.co.nz. E-mail: infor@copypress.co.nz. Price $20

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Islam versus Terrorism

Islam versus Terrorism is is a Middle Easterner’s perspective on the puzzle and problems of the Middle East. Zadeh’s informative book describes Islam, the history of the region, the clash of cultures, and the reasons for terrorism from “their point of view”, with some practical solutions. This pocket sized book is a quick reference and a straightforward explanation of the geography, culture, and internal/external problems of the countries of the region. It describes how some of America’s past foreign policies have created hatred, mistrust, and discord between the United States and the Middle East. This contention resulted in the heinous act of violence on September 11, 2001, and has continued with the present conflict in Iraq and Afganistan, affecting America’s relationship with the rest of the world.

Islam versus Terrorism, ISBN 0-9674480-1-8 can be purchased from book stores or direct from the publisher: The Copy Press. Phone: 643-547-2972. Fax: 643-547-2973. www.copypress.co.nz. E-mail: infor@copypress.co.nz. Price $15

BOOK SYNOPSIS:

This book provides pertinent information on Islamic culture, which dictates the lives of an ever-increasing number of followers, estimated at 1.6 billion. It reveals critical facts about the geographical importance of the region that have been the source of the grave misunderstandings in the minds of Westerners because of false advertisement of the U.S. politicians and mainstream media. It shows how establishing better policies for the U.S. would be a better way in deal with terrorism than attempting to kill them all.

The tragedy of September 11, 2001 was a warning, a wake-up call to Americans. It surprised many people, just as Pearl Harbor did. Until the shameful destruction of the World Trade Center and attack on the Pentagon by the terrorists, most Americans simply were not concerned about the world beyond their shores because they had their normal peaceful lives and felt secure that nothing so heinous could happen to them on their own soil.

Because of their military strength and the physical distance from troubled area the majority of Americans were not interested to know their government’s foreign policies. World Wars I and II took place in Europe and Asia; the atom bomb was dropped and destroyed Hiroshima, the Korean and Vietnam wars along with Middle East conflicts were fought in far away places. The well-thought out attack by a few fundamentalist Al Qaeda terrorists, resulted in the death of three thousand four hundred innocent people in America, was a clear proof that the U.S. is not untouchable and that there is an unhappy world across the ocean.

I believe this devastating attack contained a clear message to the U.S. government to be wary of interfering in other countries’ affairs if they wish not to become a party to the problem, which has been their policy in past. Dictating to other nations how to conduct their lies, especially the Muslim countries that have been vocal in expressing their opposition, could result in more serious consequences in the future. American politicians must learn more about other cultures and people in order to make better foreign policies. The best decision U.S. politicians could make is helping other nations rather than exploiting them for their personal benefit and life style.

Sending in military troops and name-calling is not the American Way. They only generate more hatred and aggression. If the U.S. want to play a meaningful role, as the most powerful nation on earth, it is best to be a valuable friend that a big bully.
Desperate, poverty-stricken people who are occupied by other countries do not have the financial resources and the influence that their wealthy enemies do. So, Terrorism today is the poor man’s way to fight powerful adversaries.

Continued military efforts on one side and suicide bombing on the other will only ignite deeper resentment, hatred, and retaliation in a never ending battle. A diplomatic approach and a willingness to find, soften or remove the causes of discontent would be the best solution. Islam does not promote terrorism, desperation does!

New Zealand – What Makes the Country and Her People so Special

The relaxed culture of Kiwis and the natural beauty of this land are only two reasons why visitors and locals alike call New Zealand “Godzone”. With a population of only 4.3 million people, this small corner of the world is a little known paradise. New Zealanders know more about the world than the world knows about them. Bungee jumping, Sauvignon Blanc, Pavlova, Kiwi Fruit, the Maori culture, and the All Blacks are only a few of the icons of this beautiful country.

English Down Under and Up Over

An entertaining presentation pointing out the differences between American, Canadian, British, Kiwi and Aussie English. “Putting the shoe on the other foot,” Zadeh brings us an interesting and hilarious talk in depicting slang and idioms in English to realize how much confusion learning the language creates for foreigners. This is a funny, laugh-out-loud topic for both the native English speaker and for those who speak English as a second language.

“The Journey” – From Iran to America to New Zealand

Based on his book from Iran to America to New Zealand, Zadeh describes his childhood memories of starvation, deprivation, and physical abuse, life under the dictatorship of the late Shah and his tenacious struggle for freedom. He describes the life under the restrictive Islamic government. His life story is inspirational, proving how the human spirit can overcome the most adverse circumstances to provide a happy life.


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